Yes, yes, I know. I'm throwing it slightly back with this post. But when life throws you off course sometimes all you can do is show up in your best spirit with the timing that you're given. So despite the nature of the last 6+ weeks or so, I’m back now and ready to dish about the Summit21 conference hosted by Blavity’s black-women centric focused brand, 21Ninety.

In the beginning of June I joined hundreds of vibrant, ambitious, and exceptional Black women to convene in Atlanta for 21Ninety’s conference, Summit21. Over two days, we listened to celebrities, activists and digital influencers pour their knowledge into rooms full of eager women who want nothing less than to thrive and advance their bank accounts, impact, and society for the better. I left with a feeling of camaraderie as I met women from across the country in one place to simply learn from one another. And while pretty much every gem you can imagine was dropped, I came away with 9 powerful lessons and sessions that are permanently etched in my memory from a weekend full of copious amounts of #BlackGirlMagic.

Focus on networking and creating with the woman next to you, not getting noticed by the “big names” on the stage

At conferences, we’re all clamoring to meet the current big name in XYZ.

The Bozoma St. John's. Elaine Welteroth's. Ava DuVernay's. Lena Waithe's.

They’re all on our list of aspiring people who have the job, attention or opportunities that we want, and we’ll rush the mic when Q&A’s happen, hoping that they’ll notice us. But the reality is they all started off as (and still are) regular schmegular like the rest of us. Myleik Teele, Karen Civil and Sevyn Streeter delivered unique yet similar speeches at Summit21 with one message ringing loud and clear: The people that have created some of our favorite music, movies, and TV shows aren’t the ones we should be ruthlessly aiming to connect and collaborate with, but the woman sitting next to us in all of her creative capacity is. She is the next ____ and we’re too busy saying, “I don’t know her” because she’s not Yvonne Orji or Issa Rae. At one point too our faves were undiscovered and in order to prepare for the right moment when we’re supposed to meet (and work with) the big name(s), we have to connect with the smaller name(s) to understand the value and necessity of networking across instead of always reaching up.

Pretty Instagram grids, logos, and websites are great, but nothing beats making sure you really know what you’re talking about

I’ll be the first to admit that aesthetics are my thing. I’ve always been a person who loves a good presentation because it’s easy to forget something that was said, but when you see something distinct or memorable, it’s easier to compartmentalize it in your mind. A dope website is useful and a pretty Instagram feed will keep someone’s attention for a moment but, the reality is anyone can create a nice website, make their feed pop or get affordable graphics made. But at the end of the day doing the research and applying yourself in order to be highly skilled at what you do is truly invaluable. It takes a special process of discipline to spend time not only studying your craft but also relentlessly put it into practice. When people think of your respective industry, you should be aiming to be one of the first people that comes to mind.

It doesn’t help you to just start something, you have to also finish it

First of all, this session was PACKED. I actually didn’t know the speaker beforehand but I wanted to sit in on the topic at hand because with a title like – Maintaining Your Hunger: Cultivating A Career That Feeds Your Soul + Bank Account – I was sold. And GIRL was this worth it. As a creative by nature, it’s not hard to come up with ideas whether big or small that seem like they will conquer the world. But starting and finishing aren’t one in the same, and starting comes more naturally than finishing for most of us. According to Jaqueline Baker, author of Leader By Mistake, remembering that we’re all leaders in some way, shape or form means making a habit of following through with what we start. Constantly planting seeds but never watering them is a waste of your soil. You have to plant, water, apply sunlight, etc. to reap the full harvest.

Start envisioning the life you need by physically creating it

Have you ever thought about going to look at office spaces for where you would want to have the headquarters for your business? What about test-driving a Bentley or Mercedes? These things may seem unnecessary but they are exactly what Myleik Teele did to start getting used to the lifestyle she could have. And here’s the thing, you may think that a Bentley is an extravagance that you don’t need and you’re probably right. But it’s not about what you need, it’s about having access to the resources and creating the habits to earn so that you’re able to get it should you want to. Start looking at that dream high rise condo or the house you want to own one day and you’ll unknowingly instill the mindset and habits to obtain it.

You have to reshape your beauty narrative; stop holding onto false truths

Remember those hurtful comments you received back in High School/College that you still carry with you? It’s time to reshape those. What Sarah told you about your body and how you are either too big, not curvy enough or don’t have the right hair texture - she doesn’t speak truth over your life. Dove representative, Dre Brown, had us watch a video from the new #HourWithHer as part of their Dove Self-Esteem Project and partner up with someone in the room to share our most vulnerable moment that shifted our entire self-beauty narrative. After sharing our stories, we figured out how we could have responded to reshape the harsh criticism internally. The reality is that when we’re being hurt rarely can we respond with grace and confidence to our insulter, but we can do it for ourselves. What someone told you doesn’t define your beauty narrative. Beauty comes in all shapes, sizes, shades, and colors, and it’s being represented in all of its glory now more than ever.

Living abundantly doesn’t mean you have to live in lack in order to make it

Famous financial experts and millionaires preach habits of living in lack as a prerequisite to obtaining wealth. But just because certain people (Steve Harvey, Oprah, Tyler Perry) have HAD to live in lack it doesn’t mean that it’s a requirement to make it. And it certainly doesn’t mean if you’re thriving or even simply staying afloat financially, that you should feel guilty about it. Pushing the narrative that you have to use cash in envelopes, drive a cash only (barely functioning) car or house, or live on $1 a day isn’t the universal truth to obtaining the wealth you desire. Living on less to get more isn’t the same thing as being financially educated, responsible or conscious of where your coins go. Now if you want to apply financial principles by certain people, by all means do it, but one of the most important things you can do is consider the source of your information and advice; you don’t have to apply the Dave Ramsey habits in order to become wealthy.

Remove the shame from your journey: A Fireside Chat w/Ashley Blaine Featherson and Robin Thede

This one had me in tears. TEARS. One woman stood up during the Q&A and spoke directly to Ashley with a quivering voice to address how meaningful and frankly imperative, it has been to see a beautiful, dark-skinned, Black woman representing those of us who don’t get to see ourselves on TV. And in a role so unapologetically black nonetheless? That was it. All of our emotions were shredded. This is a 4 for 1 because Ashley and Robin dropped GEMS that can’t be contained:

Remove the shame from it – what you do often won’t make sense to those around you. You may have to take on 22 survival jobs before catching your break and you may have to miss certain events or meetups, But when you’re walking in your purpose one day you will understand the importance of your sacrifices.
Find the people who want to do what you want to do as badly as you want to do it – There is NO SHAME in collaborating with people who don’t “have” anything yet because chances are you don’t have anything either. Or if you do, your duty is to network across. Find the people who love the things you're doing, the space you're in and who are striving to make the difference you are and you'll without a doubt find your tribe.
Have reckless confidence – Robin Theade made herself starve until she did what she had to do to be able to eat. She wrote for some of the biggest names in comedy and believed so relentlessly about her vision that no one could tell her anything. No one will have the confidence you need to have but you. Believe in what you’re meant to do even if it seems completely unrealistic to everyone else.
Your community has to support your purpose and your grind – Everyone around you doesn’t need to be doing what you’re doing. They don’t even have to understand what you do. But they do need to offer you support, love and space to grow.

Always, always, always reinvent and reinvest in yourself

A constant renovation of who you are and what you’re doing is absolutely necessary. Nothing lasts forever and nothing can last for a lifetime without any upgrades even if it does work consistently for 15 years. Think about it: we never really make it once we achieve our goals because even if you get everything your heart has been pining after there’s always something else to do. This lifetime journey requires it. Always be willing to improve your process, your goals and yourself.

Know the power in your cultural richness → Capitalizing On Your Blackness As A Means To Defend Against Cultural Appropriation: A Convo w/Alex Wolf

Nielsen told y’all (excluding black women) because we already knew that we’ve had the magic, we’ve been the trendsetters, and we’ve been the move makers. But the tip now is to capitalize on our real tangible blackness and be unashamed about it before people who don’t have it try to make money off of it by proximity or adaptation. (Yes, Kylie Jenner was used as an example.)

Start with where you are – The pressure to invest in fancy cameras and equipment can seem pervasive, but you have everything you need internally. You have the swag, the personality, and the influence, you just need to figure out how to use it wisely.
Don’t underestimate how your realness + blackness will resonate with people – Helloooo Issa Rae + Cardi B. We’ve been waiting for the moment when truly being who you are would resonate with everyone who's been hiding or who wants to be represented in all of our fragile, vulnerable, authenticity on TV or in music. And that moment, which will remain more than a moment, is finally here.
Focus on being relatable, not being better – Nobody is promoting mediocrity but what we are saying is be a human first and foremost. Tell your story in bits and pieces and understand how to create art with who you are and what you create your brand to be. People need to relate to your real story, not the one you create to keep up with the joneses.

Gatherings like Summit21 remind us to keep going. They give us an adrenaline boost that we desperately need in times when we feel hopeless, sluggish, and unfulfilled in our businesses or full-time jobs. They shine a light in what seems to be a perpetually-dark world and help us connect with those who are on a similar path as us. And most of all they remind us that the work will never end and that our power is in connecting, supporting, creating and continuing to grow. Keep flourishing, Queens.

Xoxo,

Sincerely, Ang.

You Already Have The Juice, Sis: 9 Powerful Lessons + Sessions From Summit21