Allow Yourself The Time and Grace Needed For Your Journey

One of the easiest and most natural things there is to do is compare. Compare the money we make, compare our successes, compare our failures, compare our number of followers or views, compare our looks, and whatever else we can measure on an uneven playing field. And social media (as much as I love it) makes it way too easy to see the award-worthy moments aka the Highlight Reel, and we easily associate that with being the everyday reality of people’s lives. It’s not, and it never is, the way anyone celebrity or regular person alike actually lives 24-7.

Let's take your favorite celebrities for example. When we see stars like Yara Shahidi or Zendaya scoring lead roles in a TV show or earn an award it can be easy to think what in the world was I doing at that age? or am I totally washed because I’m not hitting it big by the time I’m 30? While we’re busy thinking we’re failing because the focus on age is so prevalent to success, we forget to understand whether the type of projects we take on, the career path we’re on, or the person we’re becoming has anything to do with someone’s else’s level up. While every move younger kids make is thrust into the spotlight thus making us feel inadequate, looking at the brilliant Kerry Washington, Viola Davis, Mahershala Ali, or even Bianca Lawson, can provide perspective about the “silent hustle” and how more often than not many incredibly talented people often don’t receive their recognition early.

Look At Your Process As a Fine Wine  

Cheese. Wine. Kombucha. Two of the three I can actually consume easily, and all three have their proper aging process. When things grow they have a predetermined time-frame in which they’re meant to fully produce the correct nutrients to develop their best taste or structure. Wine is at its best when it’s aged – and that’s how we have to look at our journey because it’s not a sprint, it’s a long and sometimes excruciatingly slow marathon. So much like wine, you don’t want to start rushing the fermenting process of your life, because if you do you’ll end up with a bitter and unbalanced taste which benefits no one. Take pleasure in the beautiful development of your aging process because in the end it will be incredibly strong and sweet.

Support and Cheer For Others Fervently

One of my favorite things to do is to boost up those that I love. It doesn’t matter if it’s a specific event or achievement or just because I’m proud of the person that someone is becoming, I’m your personal hype woman always and in all ways. Honestly, I don’t even have to know you at all and I’m still here for your growth. When you truly celebrate the progression and ascension of others it opens up a mindset of gratitude and places you in the neighborhood to receive abundance right along with them. There’s something about sharing the achievements of others as if they were your own that just feels . . . right. Always do this while you're simultaneously climbing your own ladder to success. 

Write + Record Every Moment For Your Future Self

Did you have a journal from your first high school heartbreak? Well then if you’ve ever looked back on it you probably realize how dramatic you were but you also recognize how much you’ve (hopefully) changed and grown. I hate to say it, and it’s even harder to see it, but growth develops best from obstacles and turmoil. If you’re going through heartbreak or you’re wondering how you’re going to pay your car note this month, you’re probably not going to be able to say, “alright, I know I may default on my student loans buuutttt I’m not mad because I know that six months down the line my work is going to be published in XYZ publication or I’ll land a contract and get paid.” Nah girl. To be automatically accepting of your struggle in the thick of it is not the norm. In the moment, your perspective is likely clouded with anger, confusion, resentment and irritation. You can’t see the lesson or reason but what you can and should do is write down every event that is happening. Break down in detail every moment of intense joy and blinding rage. Be descriptive about how what is happening to you is impacting your emotions, productivity and mental health. You’ll be grateful to look back and see how you moved through the pain and now you can gracefully reflect back in order to move forward.

Reflect on Difficult Moments With Appreciation

We won’t lie to each other. This one is really, really hard and it’s especially hard if you’ve experienced personal hurt along the way. I don’t know anyone who is going to look at their current hardships with admiration while they sit in . . . like . . . literal depression. It’s almost impossible to see the light at the end of the tunnel and whatnot, but just take a moment in the midst of your tears and think about what you get to look forward to that is for you. That man who never became your boyfriend and chose someone else? He wasn’t meant for you. That big project you worked hard as hell for but never saw come to fruition? Throw that bad boy in your portfolio and keep it moving. That job you went through three rounds of interviews for but turned you down? Your dream job is around the corner. If you can find a way to grasp onto the small amount of light in the darkness then you’re already halfway to where you need to be.

Your Mistakes Are Inevitable But They Don’t Have To Be Crippling

Pssst. Hey fellow human: you’re going to make A LOT of mistakes. Some people expect you to be perfect but your superpower is that you’re far from it. You’re relatable because you’re an awkward hot mess sometimes just like the rest of us. So maybe you were late on a project or didn’t put your all into it. Or maybe you said something dumb out of ignorance. Or perhaps you got distracted and forgot to do something relatively important. Guess what one of the best things in the world is? It’s this little thing called the process of learning, adjusting and improving. The gag is that walking around as if you’re immune to mistakes only helps you make them quicker, and not in a good way. When you’re unaware of how you’re acting it’s pretty easy to slip up because you’re failing to pay attention, but if you embrace the fact that you’re going to make mistakes, you’ll have them, forgive yourself and bounce back faster.

Despite the mistakes you’re going to make or the wins you’re going to have, the best part of this life is being able to take charge of your own process and realize that you are very much still a delicate work in progress. Give yourself a little grace. 

Xoxo

Sincerely, Ang